Nomdeplume

Past few months I have witnessed a spate of marriages, most of them of colleagues working with me. Seems like the spring has bloomed this time around with a lot of marriages. Marriage is really a important step in life, as far as marriage goes in India its like a betting in a horse race...you bet on the right one...your life is secure other wise the thought itself is dreadful. Luck plays a big role in most of Indian’s married life. Its debatable whether a phenomenon like dating, which is the leading precursor to marriages in the west will shrink the part luck plays in the success of marriages. This situation exists more so due to the watertight compartments in which we conserve our inner most thoughts, ideas and wishes.
Young men, who are flirts to different levels of intensity and methodology sometime fall into the trap of love, mostly to fill the missing part of their bachelorhood, i.e. emotional support. Though bachelor men do share their emotional travails, it’s not so intense as in case when it involves a member from the opposite sex. I staunchly feel that receipt of emotional support is main reason why one of the close friends of mine, who was not even contemplating marriage any time in the near future, was swept off his feet into love and marriage. Most of the time men who say 'I hate to fall in love' or 'I will never be able to love any body' are easy targets for cupid. While love, rather unconditional love is always a great feeling, and keeps a person floating off the ground, marriage brings him back to ground i.e. realities of life. While most men pass through this phase of love in their life, only a few (should we call lucky) convert them into marriages. Also sometimes age and family pressures also force people into marriages.
Sure that marriage is a huge step in one's life, there needs to be a lot of emotional preparation before plunging into marriage. The big question is whether you are ready to accommodate, think for, plan for, be happy for, struggle for, work for, and cry for another person into your life? If you feel a strong yes then go ahead dive into the sea of married men in this world. The question as such is important because, marriage is more about sharing and caring for your other half than expecting to be cared and shared. Once you start doing this I suppose the reciprocation is going to be automatic. If you feel hesitant about any points in the question then you should seriously rethink. Being successful in marriage is about getting your priorities right and letting your partner also know about the same. A typical scenario is an IT professional marrying another IT professional and immediately after marriage he gets his first Onsite assignment. Here most of the married couples seem to get strangled in the web of confusion on whether to go onsite and make money or stay here and enjoy the niceties of married life. Most of them try to get both of them and end up getting neither of them.
If you zoom out and look at the spectrum as a whole most of the times peers in a tightly knit bachelor groups begin to feel the pressure, to think about marriage as members of the group begin to get engaged / married. Marriages usually tend to take away individuals from bachelor groups, unless in rare cases where the married parties belong to the same group. Bachelor groups lose married men in their weekend booze parties, DCH type bachelor trips, etc.
Though marriages are made in heaven, there are a lot of things that need to be sorted out before taking the ultimate decision. Well best of luck (its very essential) for the ones who have decided to take the plunge, mean while bachelors continue to see those romantic movies and expect that a very beautiful girl one day is going to come from no where and shower her unconditional love.

Feels like I am pretty late into the concept of blogging. After being in IT for 4 years and being unaware of this concept puts me to shame. Well now that i am into it lemme see whether i can do justice. Blogging was introduced to be by my colleague & friend Lijo. I liked the idea of putting ones thoughts and feelings in print and soliciting views comments from unknown corners. Though there is a lot of things on which I can blog, the pressure of getting it right the first time and the pressure not to give too much of yourselves away, has resulted in only a lot of confusion. The predicament seems similar to the situation when Ilayaraja, great composer of Tamil and to small extent Malayalam songs, had when he had to name his first symphony composition. He at last ended up naming his composition the title "How to name it". I don't know whether i have gone overboard with my comparison. Well, Looks like I have made a fair attempt at blogging...more will follow as i ponder over the things to write and squeeze my linguistic abilities.